I’m not getting into this anymore, not right now and I would rather not ever deal with this again. I would very much like to enjoy the next 11 days so I’m not a basket case. Think badly of me, I don’t care, I’m thinking about myself at least for the next 11 days because for once I’m not going to worry about everyone else.
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Passive-aggressive behavior refers to passive, sometimes obstructionist resistance to following authoritative instructions in interpersonal or occupational situations.
One of the super fun things about Erik is his passive aggressiveness. Where did this come from? Was he born this way? Was it his mom or his ex? Does he just do it for fun? I don’t think we’ll ever know.
I must note that he doesn’t fit every aspect of being PA but enough that I believe the term suits him. From a list I found I want to point out he does not fit the following: fear of dependency, fear of intimacy, fear of competition, fostering chaos or chronic lateness.
Most of the time I forget about the PA because he’s just Erik to me, annoyances and all. Lately though, they are standing out a little more than usual.
Here is how it usually works.
I ask Erik if he can do something (ie. make an appointment, do the dishes, fix something).
Erik says “ok.”
A week or so passes and I ask Erik if he did it.
Erik respondes by rolling his eyes and saying he’ll do it.
Another few weeks or months go by and I casually ask Erik if by any chance he was able to do the thing I asked him to do.
He usually groans and says he will get to it, tomorrow.
I get to the point where I have a fit and after me going on a tirade he admits he was putting it off and promises he will do it that weekend. He tells me I was right and that no, I am not a nag.
Usually about a month or two later he gets it done…when I stand in front of him and make him do it now.
This is particularly annoying when planning a wedding 
And no, he is not just a procrastinator. I firmly believe he is aggressivly passive about things although it’s unknown how he ended up this way, I think it’s too late to get better. I even have a book on this.
Image from The Catalog of Unfit Toys.
I hate that I am automatically in the same category as all other brides. I may be emotional an emotional basketcase of a bride but then I’m like that always, it just goes up a few notches when I feel pressure. I’ve never gone off on anyone, I’ve just cried a few times.
It makes me sick to my stomach when I watch the wedding shows where brides whine, cry and demand everything under the sun. How many times can they say “it’s MY day” or “it’s all about me.” Am I insane or abnormal that I believe the wedding should not only be about the bride AND the groom but also family and friends. Granted, the event is technically the bride and groom’s and it’s centered around them but it’s also an event for everyone to have fun at.
I was watching Rich Bride Poor Bride and part of me wanted to scream at the television the entire time. This girl (young and clueless) was trying to have this princess/royal wedding and didn’t care at all about what her groom wanted. Granted he wanted a wrestling wedding but you know, you sit down and discuss ideas and try to find a way to incorporate both of you into it. She actually spoke the words at one point regarding the contracts she was signing behind his back “you get to sign the marriage license, that’s it.”
She also went way over her budget because of things like an electric harpist and a limo bus (on top of the limo in the package). She kept signing contracts assuming that someone would pay for it.
To make matters worse, all the things she wanted were SO tacky. Seriously. She wanted a 6 tier cake with stairs/bridges on both sides, 6 miniatures bridesmaids, 6 miniature groomsmen and a fountain. No, I’m not kidding. Her wedding planner thankfully convinced her out of the miniatures.
Here is how I see it, granted I’ve never met one of these brides in person thankfully. If you have this outragous image of a wedding in your head and the groom doesn’t matter, you are doing it for the wrong reasons. If your wedding is all about getting exactly what you want at any cost then you are doing it for the wrong reasons. I’ll be honestly shocked if their marriage lasts longer than 3 years. Oh and he’s obviously a pussy.
I had heard my BMs hadn’t heard anything about their dresses which they ordered online and I started to think it was strange. So I called the place up and was on hold twice for like 15 minutes before the call fucking dropped. I emailed and asked for an immediate response, nothing.
I know one of the dresses was ordered in JANUARY and nothing. I’m so fucking pissed right now I can’t see straight. I don’t know what to do, I can’t get a hold of anyone. Now I’m trying to get a hold of the designer and have yet to get through either.
I don’t know what to do, I’m going to lose my fucking mind!
Why are people stupid?
I got a double thing on my registry at Linens N’ Things that I needed to pick up there but decided since one of the purchases was a duplicate I would just return it and get a gift card or whatever. I went to a cashier and she obviously was a few crayons short of a box.
Me: I need to return this, because it ended up being a duplicate.
Cashier: Ok, well I can put this on the Mastercard.
Me: Well, I actually was thinking of exchanging it for something else.
Cashier: Right now?
Me: Probably not, can I just return it for now. Can I get credit? Like a gift card?
Cashier: I’ll put it on the mastercard.
Me: I actually meant to get credit.
This happened over a few times until the manager came over who looked like Aileen Wuornos but more pissed off than a lesbian serial killer hooker.
Aileen: What’s the problem?
Me: I need to return this.
Aileen: You can’t, this person bought it.
Me: I know, from my registry but I need to return it because someone else already bought this.
Aileen: We can put it on the Mastercard.
Me: Ok, whatever (I didn’t want to fight anymore)
Finally the nice manager or whomever comes over, with an actual smile and seems like she wants to actually help me.
Amy: So what is the problem?
Me: (explain it again)
Amy: Ok, well we can’t give you a refund but we can put it on a gift card.
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